by Jarrette Wright-Booker MA, LPC-S, CAADC
Life Keeps Shifting—And Sometimes, So Do You
Let’s be honest—life be life-ing. One day you’re managing your routine, and the next, everything changes. A relationship ends. A baby arrives. A job disappears. And suddenly, the version of yourself you once knew feels…gone.
Whether the transition is expected or blindsiding, joyful or devastating, big life shifts can mess with your mental health in ways you didn’t see coming. You may find yourself exhausted, tearful, numb, or just…off. What you’re experiencing might not just be stress. It could be depression showing up in the aftermath of change.
“I Should Be Fine, Right?”: Why Depression After Change Is Often Overlooked
Here’s the trap a lot of folks fall into: believing that if something is common, it can’t be traumatic.
- “People have babies every day—why am I falling apart?”
- “Breakups happen—why can’t I bounce back?”
- “It’s just a job—I’ll find another.”
These are the lies grind culture, toxic positivity, and generational stoicism whisper to keep you pushing through when your body, mind, and soul are screaming for help.
But let’s be clear: grief, confusion, and depression are valid responses to major transitions. It’s not weakness. It’s biology. It’s your nervous system adjusting to a loss—of routine, identity, relationships, or dreams.
Breakups: Grieving the Love and the Life You Imagined
Breakups aren’t just the end of a relationship—they’re often the end of a version of yourself. The “we” that became a habit. The future plans that quietly got erased. And when the relationship ends, it’s easy to also lose your sense of direction.
You might feel:
- Sad but also deeply numb
- Angry that it didn’t work out
- Ashamed for “failing” (especially if others had high hopes)
- Lonely, even if you’re the one who ended it
Depression after a breakup isn’t just about missing the person—it’s mourning what could have been. And that grief deserves care.
After the Baby: No One Talks About the Identity Earthquake
Everyone wants to hold the baby, but who’s holding you?
Whether it’s your first or your fourth, welcoming a child can bring joy—and also a sense of emotional free-fall. You’re not just adjusting your sleep schedule. You’re renegotiating your entire identity.
You might feel:
- Overwhelmed but pressured to look “grateful”
- Lost in your new role as a parent or partner
- Disconnected from your old self
- Emotionally flat, anxious, or irritable
Postpartum depression isn’t always tears—it can be irritability, emotional detachment, and intense guilt for not “loving every moment.” You’re not a bad parent. You’re adjusting. And you don’t have to do it alone.
The Layoff: Losing a Job and Your Sense of Self
If you’ve ever been laid off, you know: it’s more than just losing a paycheck. It can feel like a gut-punch to your identity, especially in a society that equates productivity with worth.
You may be:
- Struggling with feelings of failure or rejection
- Waking up with no motivation or direction
- Feeling anxious about your financial future
- Questioning your purpose or value
Depression post-layoff is real, even if you “knew it was coming.” And when bills keep coming but your self-esteem is in free fall, therapy can help ground you in who you are—not just what you do.
So, What Do You Do with All These Feelings?
First, stop trying to snap out of it. This isn’t something a to-do list or a productivity planner can fix. Your brain and body need time—and maybe support—to recalibrate.
Try:
- Naming the loss. What part of your identity or routine changed?
- Practicing compassion. You are adjusting, not failing.
- Finding anchors. What small things bring stability or joy right now?
- Reaching out. Not everyone will get it—but a good therapist will.
We’re Here for the You That’s Still Figuring It Out
At Introspective Counseling, we know that even the “expected” life transitions can leave you spinning. Whether you’re navigating the grief of a breakup, the overwhelm of new parenthood, or the identity loss after a layoff, our compassionate and culturally attuned therapists are here to help you process the shift—not just survive it.
Your Life Changed—Now Let’s Help You Heal
You don’t have to fake being okay while your world is changing. If life’s transitions have triggered depression or made you question who you are, we’re here to support your healing. Introspective Counseling provides space to unpack the grief, shift, and stress—all without judgment.
We proudly serve Detroit, Southfield, Farmington Hills, Bloomfield, West Bloomfield, Troy, Ferndale, Royal Oak, Warren, Sterling Heights, Livonia, Redford, Dearborn, and Dearborn Heights, MI.
👉 Schedule your first session today. This chapter of your life deserves support.
