by Jarrette Wright-Booker MA, LPC-S, CAADC
Trauma Isn’t Always a Big, Loud Event
When people hear the word trauma, they often picture something dramatic—a car accident, a natural disaster, or something that ends up on the evening news. But for many of us, trauma doesn’t look like that. It’s quieter. It lingers. It shows up in your thoughts, in your habits, in how you talk to yourself.
Unprocessed trauma is what happens when we’ve been through something overwhelming—big or small—and never got the time, space, or safety to work through it. And if you grew up in survival mode, you probably learned to just “keep pushing.” You didn’t ask for what happened, but you’re still carrying it.
What Unprocessed Trauma Might Look Like Today
You’re showing up to work, raising a family, keeping it together. But somewhere underneath all that functioning, things feel…off.
Here’s how unprocessed trauma can sneak into your daily life:
- You overthink every decision because you’re afraid of making a mistake
- You shut down or isolate when you feel overwhelmed
- You say “yes” even when you’re exhausted, because boundaries feel selfish
- You feel numb in moments that should bring joy
- You’re constantly bracing for something to go wrong
- You work yourself to the bone to prove you’re worthy
Sound familiar?
These patterns aren’t about weakness. They’re about protection. Your nervous system learned to stay on high alert because, at some point, it had to. But that doesn’t mean you have to live like that forever.
The Trauma You Didn’t Choose, But Still Carry
Maybe it was emotional neglect. Maybe it was physical abuse.
Maybe it was growing up in a home where love had conditions.
Maybe it was being the “strong one” who no one ever checked on.
Maybe it was racism, microaggressions, or having to shrink yourself to be accepted in white spaces.
The truth is, trauma isn’t always about what happened. Sometimes, it’s about what didn’t happen—feeling unseen, unsupported, or unsafe in the moments that mattered most.
Healing Starts With Awareness
You can’t heal what you can’t name. But once you begin to see these patterns for what they are—trauma responses, not personality flaws—you open the door to something powerful: choice.
Choice to rest.
Choice to set boundaries.
Choice to ask for help.
Choice to explore therapy without shame.
Trauma may have shaped how you learned to survive, but healing can shape how you learn to thrive.
Therapy Can Help You Set the Bag Down
At Introspective Counseling, we understand that healing from trauma doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process that requires patience, support, and most importantly—safety. Our team of culturally responsive therapists and compassionate counselors offers a space where your story can be heard without judgment or the need to perform.
If you’re a high-functioning Black professional who’s tired of carrying so much without ever being asked how you’re really doing, know this: healing is possible. And you don’t have to do it alone.
Whether you’re just beginning to explore how trauma shows up for you or you’ve known for a while that something deeper needs attention, trauma therapy can be a meaningful first step. You deserve a space to feel seen, held, and whole—on your own terms.
